Catching Spiders

Okay, more like *killing* spiders. I have no qualms about admitting that I kill spiders if I can. All things that have more than 4 legs scare the bejesus out of me. I'm not talking a little "oh my there's a spider!" kind of thing ... more like sitting and staring at it in trepidation with a cold tingling going down my spine.

So how does one so afraid of spiders go and kill them? Trust me, each time is a little horror story in my head. Often I get the instruments of spider destruction out in my hand and merely sit or stand there staring at it, unable to move my hands. These instruments of spider destruction vary: vacuum cleaner, fly swatter, fly zapper, cup and paper, a shoe... etc.

I've had some bad experiences with some of those instruments. Vacuum cleaners aren't always strong enough to suck the spider from wherever it might be hiding; if it's out in the open then it's hard to aim the rather small nozzle right on top of it and god forbid I miss and it starts freaking out and crawling insanely. Fly swatter / shoe, again, if I miss then it'll be hell to make that thing stop crawling. Fly zapper isn't flexible enough; I get so scared that the spider will simply crawl out from under it because it's a flat plastic disc. Cup and paper: I am so terrified of sliding that paper under the cup because the spider might escape, then lifting the cup and paper afterwards is horrendous. I've had spiders escape from the cup and paper so many times I no longer trust it.

Today I developed a new way to capture and kill spiders and I think I'll be using it for a while. It still fills me with terror to do it but it's the safest way I've found so far. Sadly it'll only work if it's on a vertical surface or the ceiling. It's kind of like the cup and paper but different. You need a cup (clear one so you can see what's going on inside), maybe some plastic wrap, and some sticky and/or viscous fluid such as lotion, bath gel, liquid detergent, or honey. Today I used bath gel. First, I put the plastic wrap in the cup so that it lines the cup and still comes up and over the lip of the cup. Then I put my bath gel inside liberally. This next part is the part that terrifies me but then you put the cup over the spider and hold it tight against the surface the spider is on. Still pressing tightly against the surface to make sure there is no gap through which the spider can escape, move the cup around so that the spider is compelled to move. Sooner or later the bath gel will ooze its way towards the lip of the cup and sooner or later as you keep the spider moving the spider will end up in it. Give it a little while to thoroughly encase itself inside the liquid then carefully remove the cup in a scooping motion to catch the liquid. Gather up the sides of the plastic wrap, twist, and now you have a little baggie that you can toss in the trash. Alternatively, you can skip out on the plastic wrap and just rinse out the cup with water and send the critter down the drain.

The reason I like this method is because it puts a stop to what terrifies me the most about spiders: their crawling. Especially when they are scared and scuttling around really fast, it gives me the creeps. Also trapping the spider under the cup is a lot easier than smacking it with something as you can be as slow as you want, guaranteeing precision. Only down side is that you probably will get some of the crap you used on your wall/vertical surface.

I just realized that if you have a tile/laminated floor you can still use this method. Just let the liquid drip down and eventually encase the spider and then scoop it up with a paper towel once you're sure it's dead or immobile.

The one I killed today was a pretty big one. Not by world-wide standards but of the ones I've seen in my room it's got to be one of the biggest. It had a white stripe down the middle of its back. So glad it's gone... I know in all probability it wouldn't have done anything to me (that goes for most bugs I encounter really) but it still freaked me the hell out. I have had spider bites before though so I will show no mercy. Besides... I'm too scared to show mercy. Can't transport one live.