Are You Happy?

So my mother has recently acquired this CD from a church friend of hers (my mother is the only religious person in my family) which features this Korean priest talking on various subjects. She likes to listen to it in the car so I get to listen to parts of it too whether I like it or not. One particular subject caught my attention. Happiness. But not just happiness, nor happiness for just anyone: happiness for South Koreans.

Now most of my audience probably isn't Korean but what the heck, a little cultural education never hurt anyone. The priest talked about the happiness level of Koreans and how it was ranked the lowest out of the developed countries. I looked it up online and he did, in fact, speak the truth. The OECD as well as Yonsei University (one of the top universities in South Korea) did surveys to find that Koreans were severely unhappy compared to their quality of life. Why? Culture. Stupid culture, perhaps. I always thought so.

So the priest talked about how Koreans ALL strive to get their children into the University of Seoul. Out of all those people, 1% of those people actually get into UoS. That MAY seem like a harshly small number but remember how small a country South Korea is. That means EVERY student in S. Korea has a higher percentage of being able to afford to go to UoS (and because it is Korea's best university, everyone who can WILL go there) unlike a huge country like U.S.A. where some smart people couldn't get to Harvard if they wished simply because of distance, travel costs, and family. Also remember that S. Korean culture is VASTLY different from this here western culture. A lot of people who are average smarts are content with that. They'll just go to an average university and they're perfectly fine with that. That's all they ever really reached for and that's all anyone ever expected them to reach for. In Korea, even if you're stupid as shit you TRY to get into UoS. You study your ass off. Which means that a higher percentage of the Korean population is trying to get into ONE school which inversely means a higher percentage of applications must be turned down.

Now that explaining that number of "1%" is over let's get into the problems this causes. Why did the priest bring this school and its 1% admission rate up in the discussion? Because this is the center focus of it all. Studying. I know, I know. How very typical. Asians. Studying. But I don't think a lot of western people realize how much grief this causes us Asians. I feel like a lot of western people see this as something inherent in all Asians and therefore must be something that comes easy for us. No. It's not. Asians have stupid people just like you westerners. Asians have people who suck at studying, Asians have people who just don't GET IT. But that doesn't change the expectations for anyone. The expectations of greatness, intelligence, high achievement, good job after university is STILL there. no matter who you are.

Most Korean children don't have much of a childhood. They're dropped into the studying pressure environment very early. They study study study. For what? To get into UoS. Their parents apply tons of pressure so that they may some day get into UoS. I bet your idea of studying doesn't even come close to what these kids do day in, day out. When my cousin was 14 he went to school 2 hours early to study there before class. After school he'd quickly grab something to eat from a street food vendor (these people make their living off of busy students) and go straight to tutoring. Afterward, he'd come home for dinner maybe get an hour or so of free time. Then he's out again, off to the library to study there. He comes home after midnight and goes straight to sleep... Then his day starts again, just like the one before. Is it a wonder that these people are unhappy? Where do you even find a moment to even crack a joke in the midst of all that?

Then reality crashes down. Only 1% of students get into UoS. Parents are disappointed in you. You're disappointed in yourself. All that studying you did, all that you've accomplished is nothing in anyone's eyes. You didn't get in. You only get scorn from your parents, nagging from them that you should have studied more. So off you go to the second or third, fourth, maybe fifth choice of university. Now this is where I find it so stupid. In Korea University is a lot easier than high school. Backwards. I know. This ALWAYS infuriated me because in my eyes it was SUCH a waste of your childhood. You're never going to get your childhood back. Yet you spent all that time being so focused on studying. Then when the system finally gives you a bit of a break you now have other things to worry about. Like a job and paying bills, and taking care of yourself.

Now you get into your job and you don't get a break. You can't get sick. You can't take vacations. You can't slack off. Why? Because South Korea is over populated. Also the education rate in Korea is very very high. That means that you are NEVER irreplaceable. In fact there are always a ton of people who are willing to step forward and take your job. If you show your boss that you don't do work as well as some other people do, you're gone. After all, if there's someone who can do the job better at no extra cost... why would anyone keep you? So you work work work your ass off to secure your place. Then beware when you get old. The younger generation is coming in and if you don't have anything to show for your years of experiences, a little youngster is going to take your place.

So you see, Koreans never get a peace of mind. There's always something snapping at their heels. They HAVE to keep moving. Without peace of mind there is no happiness.

Luckily, I escaped this. My parents decided to immigrate to Canada in 1998. At school I was just starting to be treated more and more harshly... then I got on a plane and came here where school was basically colouring and raising butterflies. I still experienced some of pressure, my parents still acting Korean and what not, but the environment was a huge huge difference. I am grateful that I got to experience true childhood and not this madness the Korean children go through.