Worse Is Better

I'm curious to know whether there has ever been a time where better was better. I know, better is always better. So, what AM I talking about? Complaints. Better is never better between complainers. I won't really go into complainers themselves as everyone has some sort of gripe about complainers and being one myself it would be rather hypocritical. We can, however, look into one of the most common complainer's syndrome: Worse is better.

I noticed this very early on in my life that worse seems to always be better when taking part in a complainer's conversation. There's almost a sort of pride about it too. Before we get into that however, let's explain what exactly I mean by "worse is better." I'll simply record my earliest memory of an encounter with this syndrome and that should be self-explanatory. It's elementary school grade 4. I'm in the girl change room as everyone is getting changed into their gym clothes. The little girls are whining about having to partake in physical activity so early in the morning and inevitably comes the first complaint of, "Ugh I'm SO tired. I only had six hours of sleep last night." Immediately they are countered with, "Yeah? Well, I only got four hours." Then another boasts, "Well I didn't sleep at all!" Likely story... but that's beside the point. Boast. It's the perfect word to describe this syndrome. People like to  boast when complaining of having the worse situation!

It is as if having the worst situation gives them the right to complain. All others have lost their right to complain as there's someone in their midst who has "suffered worse." I think there are a variety of people with this syndrome and it's not triggered by the same thing with everyone. Some people want the sympathy, some people want the spotlight, and some people are just reminded at that time that they have a similar and maybe worse situation and now would be a good time to complain about it. The last one is a common denominator of any group of complainers. The reason I don't deem it the primary reason for this syndrome is that the syndrome has a gradation.

"Worse is better" most often works from least to most. Somehow it's not the kid who got "no sleep at all" who pipes up first, it's the kid who got six hours.... and then the four hours, then finally the no sleep kid. Wouldn't you think that the person with the worst would be the first to speak up as they're "suffering" through the worst of it? I guess the only explanation is the comment I made earlier: "likely story." Stretching the truth. Those kids probably all got around 6 - 7 hours of sleep if not more. They just want to complain! And why do they want to complain? Refer to the list I gave earlier of the syndrome triggers: sympathy and attention. It's rather interesting the lengths people go to for those two things.

I speak a bit derisively of the people who have the "worse is better" syndrome but I have to admit that sometimes I fall victim to it too. It's hard to resist pitching in with the complaints when people around you are bleating theirs. Being a fairly big complainer myself I find it especially hard. That is why I have such respect for people who can sympathize or empathize and stop there. You know, the people who listen and show they understand your "suffering" and try to make you feel better with positive comments or what not. Or maybe you don't know... those people are hard to come by.